I think the top and bottom thing is strongly linked to power and the power dynamic that is going on between the people having sex and the relationships in general. Sometimes I get asked about how people work out who is the top and who is the bottom. See all the posts about how to have more enjoyable and consensual sex Who is the top and bottom If being a top or bottom isn’t for you, fine, but if you’re interested please read on. Also it’s totally fine for this to change over time.įor a lot of people, sex isn’t really about the dynamic but just the kinds of sexual activities they may enjoy and working out what they do, when they do it and how they do it. Some people like to say that they are are ‘versatile’ or a ‘switch’. Many people find that they either do a little bit of topping or bottoming, or a bit of both or are a bit neutral. A lot of people really aren’t into this.įor many people sex is much more of a sharing kind of thing where they do lots of different kinds of things together rather than one person being ‘the top’. You don’t have to do this top and bottom thing – I’m just explaining it.
